Mood Swings and PMS :)

Mood Swing (noun)

-Alternation of a person's emotional state between periods of euphoria and depression.

This might be PMS (pre-menstrual syndrome). It must be. I've been feeling a bit wasted and empty at the end of the day for the past week. And suddenly, after singing to myself a rather shaky version of 98 Degrees' "Because of You", I felt like crying. Now I feel like crap.

For a few minutes (and I mean very few), I remembered my only ex-boyfriend. I missed him. But I can't say that I haven't moved on, I know this isn't entirely about him, because after a while I already felt okay. I guess it's normal to have regrets and miss your ex-whatever occasionally, here and there. I guess a memory of a happy moment can either make you feel happy or sad, or maybe both. I guess sometimes we just savor the memories we try so hard to hold on to, and then drop it all of a sudden, because there are just things that are never going to happen anymore. And though we're just dying to see those things come to life, we know that letting them be is the best thing to do.

Masaya ba ako?

Masaya ba ako tuwing nagkaka-crush ako sa UP Baguio?

Oo. Inspired ako.

Masaya ba ako sa reaksyon ng mga tao upang ipakita na crush nila ako?

Sa una. Pero ayaw ko kasi nun, wala nang challenge.

Masaya ba ako 'pag nakikita kong nare-realize mong wala na akong gusto sa'yo pagkatapos ng lahat ng 

effort mo?

Hindi. Kasi kaibigan kita. Mahalaga ka.

Masaya ba ako tuwing may bago nanaman akong crush na kinakikiligan at pinag-uusapan?

Oo naman. Pero hindi, kapag nandiyan ka sa tabi at nakikinig.

Masaya ba ako na may kakayahan akong saktan ka o paasahin ka kahit wala naman akong ginagawa sa'yo?

Hindi. Hindi talaga.

Masaya pa ba ako tuwing nandiyan ka?

Hindi na.

Pasensya na ha. Ganito lang talaga ako. Wala lang kasi talaga sa'yo yung ugaling hinahanap ko. Pasensya na kung ikinukumpara kita sa isang taong wala namang kinalaman sa'yo. 'Wag ka mag-alala. Nung nakita ko na kawawa ka, napag-desisyunan kong wala na akong crush. Para fair. Kaya ayun, sa mga ayaw maniwala, pasensya, wala na talaga eh.